Agenda
The Role of Vulnerability in Building Strong Romantic Partnerships
The Role of Vulnerability in Building Strong Romantic Partnerships
Début de l'événement :
17.12.2023
Fin de l'événement :
19.12.2023
Chapo de l'article :
The 5 Warning Signs Of A Bad Relationship
Stop Comparing Us To Aidan From Sex And The City!
The Truth About Women’s Dating Blogs
Is Bradley Cooper The Male Carrie Bradshaw?
My Low-Maintenance Dream Girl Wishlist
The Little Things Women Do That Turn Men On
Being A Bitch Can Save Your Love Life
Why Your Dating Standards Start with You
The Backlash of Fornication for Single Christians
Learn to Trust God’s Warnings in Relationships
10 Qualities Saved Sisters Seek in a Man
Overcoming Dating Angst as a Christian
Just finished reading Saibear’s blog and skimming through the posts. I try to mostly stay a silent observer on these things, but I feel the need to add my voice to this conversation. My voice being the voice of a NON-feminist brother.
Point Black – if a man is not trying to holla at you, most of the time it has nothing to do with your political views or intelligence – he most likely is just not that attracted to you. Never in my 37 years of life have I ever heard or encountered a Black man who said “oh she is fine, but I don’t like her politics”. As a heterosexual male, please believe me if we find a woman physically attractive and even think that she has just a OK personality, we are not going to let your politics get in the way.
In my opinion, if a man is not reciprocating the interest of a woman, there is only a short list of what is going on – 1) He does not find you physically attractive (in my single days, if I had someone in the friendbox, this was the #1 reason), 2) He does not like your personality , 3) He likes you and does not know how to close the deal or 4)He already has a woman somewhere and he is one of those rare brothers that actually respect the boundaries of relationships.
That is it. Normal every day heterosexual males are not complex….
Sofia
July 15, 2010 at 4:31 pm
@Saibear. Thank you very much for the clarification. I understand your position much better. Yes, it can be very difficult to tease out all the issues in general never mind in a blog post. Everyone who writes — especially on a public, online forum — struggles with that. If it were all that simple, we woulda done kicked patriarchy’s ass by now. :-0
@Toldja. There’s been a whole lotta of assignation going on both ends. I’ll take responsibility and apologize for any leaps I might have made. (Keep in mind that I’m carrying with me some comments made on the blog where the original post lives and not just what was said here. In fact, the position, “You are heteronormative, that’s wack and we aren’t trying to hear it” was the at the core of a comment ironically that came from a poster who in her initial post was very dismissive of the blog’s author.” Perhaps not everyone who is posting here has read all that’s been posted there; my bad for assuming that.)
Stop Comparing Us To Aidan From Sex And The City!
The Truth About Women’s Dating Blogs
Is Bradley Cooper The Male Carrie Bradshaw?
My Low-Maintenance Dream Girl Wishlist
The Little Things Women Do That Turn Men On
Being A Bitch Can Save Your Love Life
Why Your Dating Standards Start with You
The Backlash of Fornication for Single Christians
Learn to Trust God’s Warnings in Relationships
10 Qualities Saved Sisters Seek in a Man
Overcoming Dating Angst as a Christian
Just finished reading Saibear’s blog and skimming through the posts. I try to mostly stay a silent observer on these things, but I feel the need to add my voice to this conversation. My voice being the voice of a NON-feminist brother.
Point Black – if a man is not trying to holla at you, most of the time it has nothing to do with your political views or intelligence – he most likely is just not that attracted to you. Never in my 37 years of life have I ever heard or encountered a Black man who said “oh she is fine, but I don’t like her politics”. As a heterosexual male, please believe me if we find a woman physically attractive and even think that she has just a OK personality, we are not going to let your politics get in the way.
In my opinion, if a man is not reciprocating the interest of a woman, there is only a short list of what is going on – 1) He does not find you physically attractive (in my single days, if I had someone in the friendbox, this was the #1 reason), 2) He does not like your personality , 3) He likes you and does not know how to close the deal or 4)He already has a woman somewhere and he is one of those rare brothers that actually respect the boundaries of relationships.
That is it. Normal every day heterosexual males are not complex….
Sofia
July 15, 2010 at 4:31 pm
@Saibear. Thank you very much for the clarification. I understand your position much better. Yes, it can be very difficult to tease out all the issues in general never mind in a blog post. Everyone who writes — especially on a public, online forum — struggles with that. If it were all that simple, we woulda done kicked patriarchy’s ass by now. :-0
@Toldja. There’s been a whole lotta of assignation going on both ends. I’ll take responsibility and apologize for any leaps I might have made. (Keep in mind that I’m carrying with me some comments made on the blog where the original post lives and not just what was said here. In fact, the position, “You are heteronormative, that’s wack and we aren’t trying to hear it” was the at the core of a comment ironically that came from a poster who in her initial post was very dismissive of the blog’s author.” Perhaps not everyone who is posting here has read all that’s been posted there; my bad for assuming that.)
TheRoleOfVulnerabilityInBuildingStrongRo (Blog)
créée le 17.12.2024 à 10:34, mise à jour le 17.12.2024 à 10:34.
créée le 17.12.2024 à 10:34, mise à jour le 17.12.2024 à 10:34.
Special Kind of Fool: My Journey to Understanding Deep Love
Special Kind of Fool: My Journey to Understanding Deep Love
Date de l'article :
19.12.2021
Début de l'événement :
26.12.2022
Fin de l'événement :
28.12.2022
Chapo de l'article :
Rediscovering Love on My Own Terms
Single Men Who Want More Women
Open Letter To Men Who Want More
For Men Who Love Poly Dating
Progressive Love Applauds Too $hort
Is Love the Most Feared Emotion?
Love Kills Self Love & Self Esteem
Are Nagging & Cheating Equally Damaging?
Why Do We Fall In Love? Is It Healthy?
Why Master Monogamy
Uncle Elmer August 30, 2014 at 06:58
In other news : Looks like another case of Social Justice Warriors at work posting fake KKK recruitment flyers.
And look out, here comes da flood.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 15 Thumb down 0
TFH August 30, 2014 at 11:34
So I am going to verbalize what we here know, but needs to be spread far and wide.
What is the purpose of ‘feminism’, if not to halt this sort of sex-trafficking?
Is there ANY other thing that ‘feminism’ should prioritize, if it were a legitimate political cause of any sort?
Instead, what they do is :
1) Use the government to artificially create a Sheryl Sandberg who would not exist in the free market.
2) Crow about an imaginary rape culture among Westerners, while ignoring a REAL rape culture.
3) Whine about not enough women receiving the money generated from the tech industry (note that there is no talk of actually doing tech work, on their part).
….and a host of other phony causes.
If ‘feminism’ could not organize against this, then no one should pretend it is a real cause whatsoever.
That is the drum we have to beat.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 32 Thumb down 1
Nate August 30, 2014 at 15:30
Yet, it’s the “misogynists” in the manosphere who are appalled by this. Pick a site at random and you will find a post condemning what happened. Look to a feminist or mainstream site – crickets.
Single Men Who Want More Women
Open Letter To Men Who Want More
For Men Who Love Poly Dating
Progressive Love Applauds Too $hort
Is Love the Most Feared Emotion?
Love Kills Self Love & Self Esteem
Are Nagging & Cheating Equally Damaging?
Why Do We Fall In Love? Is It Healthy?
Why Master Monogamy
Uncle Elmer August 30, 2014 at 06:58
In other news : Looks like another case of Social Justice Warriors at work posting fake KKK recruitment flyers.
And look out, here comes da flood.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 15 Thumb down 0
TFH August 30, 2014 at 11:34
So I am going to verbalize what we here know, but needs to be spread far and wide.
What is the purpose of ‘feminism’, if not to halt this sort of sex-trafficking?
Is there ANY other thing that ‘feminism’ should prioritize, if it were a legitimate political cause of any sort?
Instead, what they do is :
1) Use the government to artificially create a Sheryl Sandberg who would not exist in the free market.
2) Crow about an imaginary rape culture among Westerners, while ignoring a REAL rape culture.
3) Whine about not enough women receiving the money generated from the tech industry (note that there is no talk of actually doing tech work, on their part).
….and a host of other phony causes.
If ‘feminism’ could not organize against this, then no one should pretend it is a real cause whatsoever.
That is the drum we have to beat.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 32 Thumb down 1
Nate August 30, 2014 at 15:30
Yet, it’s the “misogynists” in the manosphere who are appalled by this. Pick a site at random and you will find a post condemning what happened. Look to a feminist or mainstream site – crickets.
SpecialKindOfFoolMyJourneyToUnderstandi (Blog)
créée le 10.12.2024 à 10:38, mise à jour le 10.12.2024 à 10:38.
créée le 10.12.2024 à 10:38, mise à jour le 10.12.2024 à 10:38.
Double Standards in Relationships: Men vs. Women
Double Standards in Relationships: Men vs. Women
Date de l'article :
24.12.2022
Début de l'événement :
24.12.2022
Fin de l'événement :
26.12.2022
Chapo de l'article :
The Wingwoman
Change You Can Believe In: Yourself
Quick to Pass Judgment
Why Some People Hate Valentine’s Day
I’m Single on Valentine’s Day
My Secret Social Identity
What Exactly Is Dating? It’s Ambiguous.
Why Love Is Not a First Sight Thing
Chivalry Makes Women Feel Good
Relationship Experts: Hate The Player Or The Game?
The Double Standard of Men and Women
The Double Standard of Men and Women
The Double Standard of Men and Women
8 Ways to Make a Guy Not Want to Sleep with You
8 Ways to Make a Woman NOT Want to Sleep with You
As much as we’d like to, we cannot overlook gender differences. In a perfect world, your hypothetical scenario would be comparing apples to apples; currently it’s like comparing apples to hubcaps. I do not claim a woman’s libido is any less than a man’s, simply that her social and biological connection to it are different. All want for hedonism aside, your proposed revolution puts women at a disadvantage, bearing the burden and the risks while failures are dismissed as “he wasn’t good enough for you anyway then.”
Someone needs to be putting on the breaks. We cannot all do as we wish at all times sexually, as there are consequences. I do not know why the female ends up being the Guardian of Temple Punani, but this dynamic has evolved for a reason. There are other means to achieve gender equity with sex other than advocating people screw whenever they please. Women think they are empowered because they “date/fuck like a man” when in fact, no one should be.
As an addendum to an atrociously long reply, I hope this is all taken as spirited debate (as spirited as one can be on the internet) and not personal in any way.
Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0
Reply
19jackie March 5, 2010 at 5:34 PM
Themis, spirited debate is far more interesting that agreeing with people who already agree with me. If we don’t discuss these things openly, it’s impossible to make progress. I have to say this: had she asked me to wait, I would not have labeled her a tease; I would have respected her position as I respect yours. I’ll also submit that I have been the one to walk away from sex on more than one occasion, unafraid of what would be thought of me.
Change You Can Believe In: Yourself
Quick to Pass Judgment
Why Some People Hate Valentine’s Day
I’m Single on Valentine’s Day
My Secret Social Identity
What Exactly Is Dating? It’s Ambiguous.
Why Love Is Not a First Sight Thing
Chivalry Makes Women Feel Good
Relationship Experts: Hate The Player Or The Game?
The Double Standard of Men and Women
The Double Standard of Men and Women
The Double Standard of Men and Women
8 Ways to Make a Guy Not Want to Sleep with You
8 Ways to Make a Woman NOT Want to Sleep with You
As much as we’d like to, we cannot overlook gender differences. In a perfect world, your hypothetical scenario would be comparing apples to apples; currently it’s like comparing apples to hubcaps. I do not claim a woman’s libido is any less than a man’s, simply that her social and biological connection to it are different. All want for hedonism aside, your proposed revolution puts women at a disadvantage, bearing the burden and the risks while failures are dismissed as “he wasn’t good enough for you anyway then.”
Someone needs to be putting on the breaks. We cannot all do as we wish at all times sexually, as there are consequences. I do not know why the female ends up being the Guardian of Temple Punani, but this dynamic has evolved for a reason. There are other means to achieve gender equity with sex other than advocating people screw whenever they please. Women think they are empowered because they “date/fuck like a man” when in fact, no one should be.
As an addendum to an atrociously long reply, I hope this is all taken as spirited debate (as spirited as one can be on the internet) and not personal in any way.
Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0
Reply
19jackie March 5, 2010 at 5:34 PM
Themis, spirited debate is far more interesting that agreeing with people who already agree with me. If we don’t discuss these things openly, it’s impossible to make progress. I have to say this: had she asked me to wait, I would not have labeled her a tease; I would have respected her position as I respect yours. I’ll also submit that I have been the one to walk away from sex on more than one occasion, unafraid of what would be thought of me.
DoubleStandardsInRelationshipsMenVsWome (Blog)
créée le 19.12.2024 à 10:46, mise à jour le 19.12.2024 à 10:46.
créée le 19.12.2024 à 10:46, mise à jour le 19.12.2024 à 10:46.
The Evolution of Dating Norms in the Digital Age
The Evolution of Dating Norms in the Digital Age
Date de l'article :
24.12.2022
Début de l'événement :
24.12.2022
Fin de l'événement :
26.12.2022
Chapo de l'article :
A Few Thoughts on Conflict in Dating
Why Trying to "Be More Feminine or Masculine" is a Trap
"Not Good Enough"
Chasing After Instant Chemistry is Foolish
Does Longevity in the Past = Mature Dater Today?
Are You Really Prepared for a Relationship?
Guys Don’t Want to Date “One of The Guys”
Things I Have Learned About Dating
Fear in Dating and Relationships
Does the Person You're Dating Make You Smile
Marrige and Happiness
Is Your Resolution to Find Love in the New Year?
Disappearing Dates
Anyway just for a bit of an alternative point of view, I’m actually loving the ‘erasure’ of sexuality you’re all complaining about. I wouldn’t really call it that, but it seems to be the same thing as you’re talking about. I thought I was a lesbian until very recently (wayyy too late in life to have such a revelation, really!), when I met my current, male, partner. This is the best relationship I’ve ever had, for reasons that absolutely do not directly involve his gender. But indirectly? The reason I’m not so stressed and worrying in this relationship is because we don’t have to keep anything secret or be nervous and hide it when we’re outside in case someone makes a comment. Being in an opposite-sex relationship is amazing. I’m sorry it has to be the case, but it really is true. I think I’m probably about 99% gay and 1% straight… ish.
Heterosexual privilege can feel wonderful indeed, when it’s something you aren’t used to. I sometimes wonder what it would feel like to be with a guy and have it again, albeit in a different way from how I felt it before — and noticed its loss when I was in a publicly same-sex relationship for a year or so after I transitioned, as compared to the publicly different-sex relationship (so far as the world was concerned) that I was in prior to my transition.
I should add that I do sort of identify as bisexual, even though I have never in my life been with a guy, either before or after my transition. I assume that it’s OK to do that.
Completely ok in my book. I don’t hold to the notion that experience is required before anyone gets to ID as a particular orientation, and I’ll push back against anyone who does. Welcome to the bi club. :)
Me neither, maedchen. Bi is, in my book, people who have been attracted to <1 genders. No sex, dating or relationships required.
I can certainly understand not wanting to be part of the queer community, especially given the bad history of the word queer. I wonder though what you meant by this:
Also, just because I have a certain sexuality doesn’t mean I’m part of some mythical community. I’m part of the normal community, thanks.
since the queer community is neither mythical not abnormal.
Yeah, that was my reaction too. I freely admit that it’s mostly spurred by bitterness.
Why Trying to "Be More Feminine or Masculine" is a Trap
"Not Good Enough"
Chasing After Instant Chemistry is Foolish
Does Longevity in the Past = Mature Dater Today?
Are You Really Prepared for a Relationship?
Guys Don’t Want to Date “One of The Guys”
Things I Have Learned About Dating
Fear in Dating and Relationships
Does the Person You're Dating Make You Smile
Marrige and Happiness
Is Your Resolution to Find Love in the New Year?
Disappearing Dates
Anyway just for a bit of an alternative point of view, I’m actually loving the ‘erasure’ of sexuality you’re all complaining about. I wouldn’t really call it that, but it seems to be the same thing as you’re talking about. I thought I was a lesbian until very recently (wayyy too late in life to have such a revelation, really!), when I met my current, male, partner. This is the best relationship I’ve ever had, for reasons that absolutely do not directly involve his gender. But indirectly? The reason I’m not so stressed and worrying in this relationship is because we don’t have to keep anything secret or be nervous and hide it when we’re outside in case someone makes a comment. Being in an opposite-sex relationship is amazing. I’m sorry it has to be the case, but it really is true. I think I’m probably about 99% gay and 1% straight… ish.
Heterosexual privilege can feel wonderful indeed, when it’s something you aren’t used to. I sometimes wonder what it would feel like to be with a guy and have it again, albeit in a different way from how I felt it before — and noticed its loss when I was in a publicly same-sex relationship for a year or so after I transitioned, as compared to the publicly different-sex relationship (so far as the world was concerned) that I was in prior to my transition.
I should add that I do sort of identify as bisexual, even though I have never in my life been with a guy, either before or after my transition. I assume that it’s OK to do that.
Completely ok in my book. I don’t hold to the notion that experience is required before anyone gets to ID as a particular orientation, and I’ll push back against anyone who does. Welcome to the bi club. :)
Me neither, maedchen. Bi is, in my book, people who have been attracted to <1 genders. No sex, dating or relationships required.
I can certainly understand not wanting to be part of the queer community, especially given the bad history of the word queer. I wonder though what you meant by this:
Also, just because I have a certain sexuality doesn’t mean I’m part of some mythical community. I’m part of the normal community, thanks.
since the queer community is neither mythical not abnormal.
Yeah, that was my reaction too. I freely admit that it’s mostly spurred by bitterness.
TheEvolutionOfDatingNormsInTheDigitalAg (Blog)
créée le 26.12.2024 à 11:51, mise à jour le 26.12.2024 à 11:51.
créée le 26.12.2024 à 11:51, mise à jour le 26.12.2024 à 11:51.
Stop Acting Like a Ditz!
Stop Acting Like a Ditz!
Date de l'article :
25.12.2022
Début de l'événement :
03.12.2022
Fin de l'événement :
25.12.2022
Chapo de l'article :
How Pocket-Dialing Can C*ckblock You
Attack of The Killer Ex
How To Deal With A Psycho Ex During The Holidays
Attention Mongers Crybabies and Dramaheads
25 Signals You're Not Ready For a Online Dating
5 Skills Every Man And Woman Should Master
Can Sex Be A Laughing Matter?
The Sh*t Women Say That Piss Off Men
Dating a Jersey Shore Fan
Dealing With Exes on Valentine’s Day
A Decent Girl For a Nice Guy
There have been many online personals I have scrolled through while looking for dates and now I am far more picky with my selections. Oh, how I hate when I meet a girl I found on the personals for dinner who seems to be an over-achiever when it comes to her emotions. Seriously, what is up with women hopping up and down when they’re happy about the littlest god damn thing?
How I wish for the days when women were not educated by the CW or Reality Television shows. Now it seems like men have to bite their tongues while watching their dates perform a combo of baby claps and Stevie Wonder-like head bopping while they emit squeaking squeals of delight all because their appetizers have arrived.
Ladies, regardless what your mothers and your Cosmo magazines have told you in the past, good men do not like women who act less smart than they really are. You can stroke our egos by simply telling us we’re handsome and let out a slight chuckle when we say something funny. Please don’t let out Neve Campbell guffaws and say, “Oh my god! No way! That’s too funny!” when all we did was mention how we don’t like goat cheese on our salads.
Please don’t end every conversation with a question ending in the word ‘right?’ And for the love of God stop twirling your hair like a little girl waiting for an ice cream cone. It’s not attractive even if we still want to bang you after the date is over.
To get the respect of a man, you must not be afraid to be yourself. We want engaging conversation and genuine chemistry. We don’t want to end up with a girl who is lacking in substance and brain cells. So cut out the Snooki routine and act normal. Is that too much to ask for?
Attack of The Killer Ex
How To Deal With A Psycho Ex During The Holidays
Attention Mongers Crybabies and Dramaheads
25 Signals You're Not Ready For a Online Dating
5 Skills Every Man And Woman Should Master
Can Sex Be A Laughing Matter?
The Sh*t Women Say That Piss Off Men
Dating a Jersey Shore Fan
Dealing With Exes on Valentine’s Day
A Decent Girl For a Nice Guy
There have been many online personals I have scrolled through while looking for dates and now I am far more picky with my selections. Oh, how I hate when I meet a girl I found on the personals for dinner who seems to be an over-achiever when it comes to her emotions. Seriously, what is up with women hopping up and down when they’re happy about the littlest god damn thing?
How I wish for the days when women were not educated by the CW or Reality Television shows. Now it seems like men have to bite their tongues while watching their dates perform a combo of baby claps and Stevie Wonder-like head bopping while they emit squeaking squeals of delight all because their appetizers have arrived.
Ladies, regardless what your mothers and your Cosmo magazines have told you in the past, good men do not like women who act less smart than they really are. You can stroke our egos by simply telling us we’re handsome and let out a slight chuckle when we say something funny. Please don’t let out Neve Campbell guffaws and say, “Oh my god! No way! That’s too funny!” when all we did was mention how we don’t like goat cheese on our salads.
Please don’t end every conversation with a question ending in the word ‘right?’ And for the love of God stop twirling your hair like a little girl waiting for an ice cream cone. It’s not attractive even if we still want to bang you after the date is over.
To get the respect of a man, you must not be afraid to be yourself. We want engaging conversation and genuine chemistry. We don’t want to end up with a girl who is lacking in substance and brain cells. So cut out the Snooki routine and act normal. Is that too much to ask for?
Relationship Advice on How to Fight Fair
Relationship Advice on How to Fight Fair
Date de l'article :
27.05.2025
Début de l'événement :
28.05.2022
Fin de l'événement :
29.05.2022
Chapo de l'article :
All is fair in love and war…but you shoudn’t kill each other either.
I was once a feisty young thang in relationships. I won’t bore you with the details just give you some relationship advice. Let’s just say that if I recounted the countless times that I embarrassed myself (and my significant other) this post would become a novel. As a matter a fact, I published a book called Love Trips: A Collection of Relationship Stumbles. It’s a raw and personal account of my past relationships. I share the mistakes that I made with past loves and lovers. When relationships began to go awry, I’d argue, like many other couples do. I’d loose my cool and my confident demeanor crumbled. I would stop fighting fair. I became another woman and this ultimately ruined my relationships.
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The thing about relationships is that they are never perfect. At one point or another you and your partner will go through it. Whether it’s money troubles, infidelity, emotional distance or a lack of communication, no couple is immune to the ups and downs of love and commitment. There is, however, a way to deal with the negativity without rocking the boat too much. As women, we have to learn to deal with troubled waters without sinking the ship with dramatic antics and ultimatums. Here are seven things you should stop doing when there’s trouble in paradise, and you know you need to fight fair.
I was once a feisty young thang in relationships. I won’t bore you with the details just give you some relationship advice. Let’s just say that if I recounted the countless times that I embarrassed myself (and my significant other) this post would become a novel. As a matter a fact, I published a book called Love Trips: A Collection of Relationship Stumbles. It’s a raw and personal account of my past relationships. I share the mistakes that I made with past loves and lovers. When relationships began to go awry, I’d argue, like many other couples do. I’d loose my cool and my confident demeanor crumbled. I would stop fighting fair. I became another woman and this ultimately ruined my relationships.
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Looking For Singles To Date? Try Loveawake Dating Site
American Dating Personals | Canadian Personals | Aussie Personals Ads | Slovakian Online Personals | Estonian Personals | French Singles Personals
The thing about relationships is that they are never perfect. At one point or another you and your partner will go through it. Whether it’s money troubles, infidelity, emotional distance or a lack of communication, no couple is immune to the ups and downs of love and commitment. There is, however, a way to deal with the negativity without rocking the boat too much. As women, we have to learn to deal with troubled waters without sinking the ship with dramatic antics and ultimatums. Here are seven things you should stop doing when there’s trouble in paradise, and you know you need to fight fair.
Attack Mode
By attack mode I literally mean attack mode. Some women that I know (I won’t name names, I tell ya!) become aggressive when tense. Any sign of trouble and they raise their fists. Some aren’t physical but they holler and yell. If that’s how you cope with issues then you are no longer listening. When there is trouble in your relationship you have to be able to communicate your needs and feelings without growling. Anger isn’t conducive to improving your relationship.Taking No Responsibility
It’s human nature to play the Blame Game when we are upset. When things are going terribly wrong in our relationship, we don’t want to take accountability. It’s his fault there’s a communication breakdown. He should initiate sex, not you. And why doesn’t he take you out anymore? Look at what you are doing wrong and how you’re also contributing to the problem. Trust me, you are!Giving Up Too Easily
It takes two to tango and the tango is not an easy dance! When there is trouble in paradise, work through it. If you throw in the towel too quickly that may be a sign you weren’t all in to begin with.Constant Waterworks
Tears can get to a man’s heart. And women know this. Let’s not use sobbing or any form of manipulation to control our relationships. Besides, you don’t want to be the woman who cried wolf. Or the woman who is so sensitive that her man can’t express his qualms about the relationship. Sure, you can cry if that’s how you feel. But constant sobbing makes you the victim and we’re back to taking no responsibility.Telling Everyone Your Business
As women, if our relationship is going south, we want to talk about it. We call up our girlfriends, cousins and even our mamas. This is a no-no. If you keep telling your loved ones about your relationship troubles, they will begin to dislike your man. If you just have to vent, tell the world the good and the bad.Seeking Another's Affections
When hitting a rough patch in a relationship, some women seek comfort on the shoulders (and ears) of another. It may not be a sexual relationship but it is still a form of cheating. Emotional affairs occur often when women feel unfulfilled by their partners. Before you seek the affection of another, communicate with your partner and think about the repercussions.Ignoring the Problem
This mistake is huge. You don’t want to pretend that nothing is wrong in your relationship. If you do, the problem will grow as will the distance. Soon you and your partner won’t even be on the same boat. YYou must face the issues head on lest you sink your coupleship.
RelationshipAdviceOnHowToFightFair (Blog)
créée le 20.05.2025 à 11:20, mise à jour le 20.05.2025 à 11:20.
créée le 20.05.2025 à 11:20, mise à jour le 20.05.2025 à 11:20.
My Fiance Cheated and Got Another Woman Pregnant
My Fiance Cheated and Got Another Woman Pregnant
Date de l'article :
27.05.2022
Début de l'événement :
27.05.2022
Fin de l'événement :
29.05.2022
Chapo de l'article :
There are some situations in a woman’s life that nothing can prepare us for. It’s one of those circumstances that absolutely breaks our heart.
My heart shattered a few months before my wedding. I was fighting with my fiancé and, suddenly, mid sentence, he said, “I just had a baby.” His words came out of nowhere. I felt blindsided. He then walked into the other room and refused to talk about it. He had zero remorse.
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I did not understand how this could happen. I lived with my fiancé. He came home every night. There was no suspicious behavior: no secret phone calls, texts or social media activity that would raise concern. Suddenly, it hit me. He had a “business trip” in North Carolina seven months before he broke the news. His ex also happens to live in North Carolina.
I confronted him with my revelation, and he admitted it was her. But I didn’t want to believe it. I repeatedly did the math in my head, convincing myself this child could not be his.
I dwelled on the situation so much that it made me sick. I was no longer busy planning my dream wedding. The thought of him seeing his child for the first time consumed me. Would he leave me to for his ready-made family? Would he make plans every holiday to visit his baby? Would he spend it with his ex, the mother of his child? To make matters worse, he was shady and grew secretive throughout the entire ordeal. He never once expressed guilt. He made a mistake, he said, I could live with it or leave. I was suffering from intense anxiety attacks. My hair began falling out, and I gained so much weight that my wedding dress was altered. My hands were literally shaking all day. I even missed a few menstrual cycles.
Why didn’t I leave? I was marking my territory. I wanted this girl to know that he was my man. I am a highly competitive person. I wanted to win, and to win I had to marry him.
Then, the shocker of shocker: a month before my wedding I discovered that I was three months pregnant. I thought I missed my period due to the stress of it all. Still, I wasn’t happy even though I was having a baby of my own. Eventually, due to the stress, I had a miscarriage a week before the wedding.
As for my fiancé and his child, I never believed it was his – and neither did our pastor. Our Pastor convinced him to ask for a DNA test. My fiancé had been sending money for over a year and had only seen three photos of this miracle baby. The mother refused the DNA test. In a months time, she disconnected her phone number and we never heard from her again. It didn’t matter. His cheating and this lies destroyed our relationship. We did get married. I beat her! Only my prize was a lying cheater who continued to be unfaithful for years to come.
Fortunately, I saw the light. I divorced him and found my happiness.
If you are in this situation, I hope my story inspires you to walk away – now. You deserve better and you will never fully trust your cheating guy again. Pick up the pieces of your broken heart and move on. Know that men can be faithful. The man that will respect you andc love you is out there, waiting for you to be free, single and ready. Now that’s winning.
My heart shattered a few months before my wedding. I was fighting with my fiancé and, suddenly, mid sentence, he said, “I just had a baby.” His words came out of nowhere. I felt blindsided. He then walked into the other room and refused to talk about it. He had zero remorse.
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I did not understand how this could happen. I lived with my fiancé. He came home every night. There was no suspicious behavior: no secret phone calls, texts or social media activity that would raise concern. Suddenly, it hit me. He had a “business trip” in North Carolina seven months before he broke the news. His ex also happens to live in North Carolina.
I confronted him with my revelation, and he admitted it was her. But I didn’t want to believe it. I repeatedly did the math in my head, convincing myself this child could not be his.
I dwelled on the situation so much that it made me sick. I was no longer busy planning my dream wedding. The thought of him seeing his child for the first time consumed me. Would he leave me to for his ready-made family? Would he make plans every holiday to visit his baby? Would he spend it with his ex, the mother of his child? To make matters worse, he was shady and grew secretive throughout the entire ordeal. He never once expressed guilt. He made a mistake, he said, I could live with it or leave. I was suffering from intense anxiety attacks. My hair began falling out, and I gained so much weight that my wedding dress was altered. My hands were literally shaking all day. I even missed a few menstrual cycles.
Why didn’t I leave? I was marking my territory. I wanted this girl to know that he was my man. I am a highly competitive person. I wanted to win, and to win I had to marry him.
Then, the shocker of shocker: a month before my wedding I discovered that I was three months pregnant. I thought I missed my period due to the stress of it all. Still, I wasn’t happy even though I was having a baby of my own. Eventually, due to the stress, I had a miscarriage a week before the wedding.
As for my fiancé and his child, I never believed it was his – and neither did our pastor. Our Pastor convinced him to ask for a DNA test. My fiancé had been sending money for over a year and had only seen three photos of this miracle baby. The mother refused the DNA test. In a months time, she disconnected her phone number and we never heard from her again. It didn’t matter. His cheating and this lies destroyed our relationship. We did get married. I beat her! Only my prize was a lying cheater who continued to be unfaithful for years to come.
Fortunately, I saw the light. I divorced him and found my happiness.
If you are in this situation, I hope my story inspires you to walk away – now. You deserve better and you will never fully trust your cheating guy again. Pick up the pieces of your broken heart and move on. Know that men can be faithful. The man that will respect you andc love you is out there, waiting for you to be free, single and ready. Now that’s winning.
MyFianceCheatedAndGotAnotherWomanPregnan (Blog)
créée le 20.05.2025 à 11:14, mise à jour le 20.05.2025 à 11:14.
créée le 20.05.2025 à 11:14, mise à jour le 20.05.2025 à 11:14.
Are Traditional Gender Roles Still Relevant in Modern Dating
Are Traditional Gender Roles Still Relevant in Modern Dating
Date de l'article :
26.03.2021
Début de l'événement :
26.03.2022
Fin de l'événement :
28.03.2022
Chapo de l'article :
We’re All Slutty For The Right Guy
Dear Men: This Is Why Loyalty Is So Important To Women
How Do You Avoid Dating a Liberal/Conservative?
Are You Looking For Fast Love Too?
Should You Fake an Active Lifestyle for Love?
When a Relationship Feels Like a Secret Mission
Pushing Through It
Embracing The Unexpected Path Of Singlehood
Why Is It So Hard to Believe Someone Might Stay?
Am I Crazy Or Is He A Hot Mess?
Happiness:
You are happiest after making empty goals for yourself that usually came directly from a cheesy self help book.
Signature Qualities:
Sloth, consistently good Netflix choices, getting drunk at dinner parties and saying inappropriate things
Famous Tank Floaters:
Britney Spears, Dennis Quade, Amy Winehouse
Your Reading:
Imagine yourself a fish swimming around aimlessly in a small tank – you come to the glass wall and can see freedom on the other side, but there’s no way to get out. That’s you – swimming from one dysfunctional relationship to the next, or through one long bad one, wanting to escape yet knowing that’s not really an option. You are a creature of habit, which in this case is soul crushing relationships that give you nothing but emotional baggage, wrinkles and an addiction to sleeping pills. As habits go, this is a pretty bad one. You consider single life until you catch a glimpse of the lonely – someone eating sushi alone, a woman reading solo in a park, a man playing tennis with himself – causing you to retreat back to your future, which is looking increasingly desperate and dark. You know it’s a destructive pattern, but that’s how it is in the toilet tank of life.
Sex:
It is your opinion that you haven’t been screwed properly in a decade or more.
Love:
You fell in love once, with your orthodontist.
Happiness:
You are happiest when traveling, because it’s non-committal.
Dear Men: This Is Why Loyalty Is So Important To Women
How Do You Avoid Dating a Liberal/Conservative?
Are You Looking For Fast Love Too?
Should You Fake an Active Lifestyle for Love?
When a Relationship Feels Like a Secret Mission
Pushing Through It
Embracing The Unexpected Path Of Singlehood
Why Is It So Hard to Believe Someone Might Stay?
Am I Crazy Or Is He A Hot Mess?
Happiness:
You are happiest after making empty goals for yourself that usually came directly from a cheesy self help book.
Signature Qualities:
Sloth, consistently good Netflix choices, getting drunk at dinner parties and saying inappropriate things
Famous Tank Floaters:
Britney Spears, Dennis Quade, Amy Winehouse
Your Reading:
Imagine yourself a fish swimming around aimlessly in a small tank – you come to the glass wall and can see freedom on the other side, but there’s no way to get out. That’s you – swimming from one dysfunctional relationship to the next, or through one long bad one, wanting to escape yet knowing that’s not really an option. You are a creature of habit, which in this case is soul crushing relationships that give you nothing but emotional baggage, wrinkles and an addiction to sleeping pills. As habits go, this is a pretty bad one. You consider single life until you catch a glimpse of the lonely – someone eating sushi alone, a woman reading solo in a park, a man playing tennis with himself – causing you to retreat back to your future, which is looking increasingly desperate and dark. You know it’s a destructive pattern, but that’s how it is in the toilet tank of life.
Sex:
It is your opinion that you haven’t been screwed properly in a decade or more.
Love:
You fell in love once, with your orthodontist.
Happiness:
You are happiest when traveling, because it’s non-committal.
AreTraditionalGenderRolesStillRelevantIn (Blog)
créée le 11.03.2025 à 17:38, mise à jour le 11.03.2025 à 17:38.
créée le 11.03.2025 à 17:38, mise à jour le 11.03.2025 à 17:38.
Set the playing field that benefits YOU
Set the playing field that benefits YOU
Date de l'article :
25.03.2022
Début de l'événement :
25.03.2022
Fin de l'événement :
27.03.2022
Chapo de l'article :
Marriage vs. Addiction: Winning the Battle for Love
Marriage Without Intimacy: Can Love Survive the Distance?
Holding On or Letting Go: When Addiction Tests a Marriage
The Marriage We Almost Lost: How Unemployment Changed Everything
Marriage And Chaos: Finding Common Ground in Parenting
He Seemed Interested. So Why Didn’t He Call?
Online Dating Isn’t Desperation
Changing Your Dating Approach
Why Modern Dating is More Complicated Than Ever
Dating Someone With Debt
Marriage vs. Parenthood: Life After Having a Baby
The Fine Line Between Casual Dating and Commitment
How to Handle the Truth After Discovering a Betray
Set the playing field that benefits YOU, don’t let other people lead you into a shitty field. You wouldn’t fight a war on the other army’s home turf if you had the option of fighting it on yours.
“then just leave.”
All good. Another victory night! You ran some good shit, avoided a time-wasting trap, and once again went through the process of “I put my pants on, I go out, and I to people and flirt with girls, that’s who Scray is.”
“So, at this point, I’m deciding that my drug dealer opener is less me.”
Cool man, your openers/routines will change and evolve as you go. I used to write down a lot of my stuff just to help me remember it, and when I look back on openers/routines I used like 5 years ago, they just completely aren’t “me” anymore. They were “me” at the time, but your vibe will change and evolve, and so will your game and the things that feel congruent for you.
“I resolve to go direct”
Also cool, give it a go, try it out, play with it. Personally I think the optimal route for a short dude is to build value/etc. with a chick’s group (or your social circle or the bartenders etc.) and then target a girl and qualify her and go direct from there, juuuust to avoid what that other short guy was saying about how instant-direct forces a girl to decide right then and there if she’s going to fuck you and since a lot of girls will categorize you as “not fuckable” based on height, you might lose out on girls that you could’ve gotten if you built a little value first and THEN went more direct.
BUT, try it out if you feel it. You have to try a bunch of different shit out and see what sticks and feels right to you. I don’t like going direct much myself because I like a lot of ridiculous verbal word-play and flirting with innuendo etc., that’s fun to me…BUT, I have gone out a bunch and gone 100% direct, and I still go direct now and then just for the practice.
It’s like if you’re a boxer, that’s cool, but if you learn to do some kicking too, you’re more well-rounded…and who knows maybe you’ll find out you really like kicking more. Only you can feel that out, but you should give kicking a chance before ruling it out, just to understand it. :)
Marriage Without Intimacy: Can Love Survive the Distance?
Holding On or Letting Go: When Addiction Tests a Marriage
The Marriage We Almost Lost: How Unemployment Changed Everything
Marriage And Chaos: Finding Common Ground in Parenting
He Seemed Interested. So Why Didn’t He Call?
Online Dating Isn’t Desperation
Changing Your Dating Approach
Why Modern Dating is More Complicated Than Ever
Dating Someone With Debt
Marriage vs. Parenthood: Life After Having a Baby
The Fine Line Between Casual Dating and Commitment
How to Handle the Truth After Discovering a Betray
Set the playing field that benefits YOU, don’t let other people lead you into a shitty field. You wouldn’t fight a war on the other army’s home turf if you had the option of fighting it on yours.
“then just leave.”
All good. Another victory night! You ran some good shit, avoided a time-wasting trap, and once again went through the process of “I put my pants on, I go out, and I to people and flirt with girls, that’s who Scray is.”
“So, at this point, I’m deciding that my drug dealer opener is less me.”
Cool man, your openers/routines will change and evolve as you go. I used to write down a lot of my stuff just to help me remember it, and when I look back on openers/routines I used like 5 years ago, they just completely aren’t “me” anymore. They were “me” at the time, but your vibe will change and evolve, and so will your game and the things that feel congruent for you.
“I resolve to go direct”
Also cool, give it a go, try it out, play with it. Personally I think the optimal route for a short dude is to build value/etc. with a chick’s group (or your social circle or the bartenders etc.) and then target a girl and qualify her and go direct from there, juuuust to avoid what that other short guy was saying about how instant-direct forces a girl to decide right then and there if she’s going to fuck you and since a lot of girls will categorize you as “not fuckable” based on height, you might lose out on girls that you could’ve gotten if you built a little value first and THEN went more direct.
BUT, try it out if you feel it. You have to try a bunch of different shit out and see what sticks and feels right to you. I don’t like going direct much myself because I like a lot of ridiculous verbal word-play and flirting with innuendo etc., that’s fun to me…BUT, I have gone out a bunch and gone 100% direct, and I still go direct now and then just for the practice.
It’s like if you’re a boxer, that’s cool, but if you learn to do some kicking too, you’re more well-rounded…and who knows maybe you’ll find out you really like kicking more. Only you can feel that out, but you should give kicking a chance before ruling it out, just to understand it. :)
SetThePlayingFieldThatBenefitsYou (Blog)
créée le 27.03.2025 à 17:35, mise à jour le 27.03.2025 à 17:35.
créée le 27.03.2025 à 17:35, mise à jour le 27.03.2025 à 17:35.
How to Avoid Dating People Who See You as Just a Burden
How to Avoid Dating People Who See You as Just a Burden
Date de l'article :
12.03.2022
Début de l'événement :
25.03.2022
Fin de l'événement :
27.03.2022
Chapo de l'article :
Is He Assertive or Just Angry?
Why I’m Done Playing by Traditional Dating Rules
Modern Romance: The New Dating Rules
Can You Spot the Four Types of Men Out There?
What to Do When a Friendship Becomes Toxic
How to Take Advantage of Being Single
He Acted Like He Was Still Single
Following My Dream Nearly Cost Me My Marriage
Agenda
A. Chivalry is a must
B. If u make the plans u pay for the plans
C. When in doubt u pay
D. Compliments never get old
E. Put in as much effort in planning the date as she does getting ready for the date
Someone should write a quick reference card on how to be a gentlemen in our changing society!
Reply
Cali Bradshaw
March 22, 2011 at 1:05 am #
Ricky! What a refreshing and lovely list. The funny thing is, guys are often so busy trying to get into our pants, that they don’t realize that these “old school” techniques will get them so much farther. Love your point E. Thanks for reading and for the comment.
-Cali
Reply
Sophie
March 21, 2011 at 8:46 pm #
Hi Cali,
I thought I’d give my point of view from ‘across the pond’ and I have to say that I don’t agree that a guy should pay all the time.
If a guy makes the first move and asks a girl out on a first date, then I think he should pay. I would offer to split it and it wouldn’t be the end of the world if he accepted that offer. But it’s certainly nicer if he refuses.
Why I’m Done Playing by Traditional Dating Rules
Modern Romance: The New Dating Rules
Can You Spot the Four Types of Men Out There?
What to Do When a Friendship Becomes Toxic
How to Take Advantage of Being Single
He Acted Like He Was Still Single
Following My Dream Nearly Cost Me My Marriage
Agenda
A. Chivalry is a must
B. If u make the plans u pay for the plans
C. When in doubt u pay
D. Compliments never get old
E. Put in as much effort in planning the date as she does getting ready for the date
Someone should write a quick reference card on how to be a gentlemen in our changing society!
Reply
Cali Bradshaw
March 22, 2011 at 1:05 am #
Ricky! What a refreshing and lovely list. The funny thing is, guys are often so busy trying to get into our pants, that they don’t realize that these “old school” techniques will get them so much farther. Love your point E. Thanks for reading and for the comment.
-Cali
Reply
Sophie
March 21, 2011 at 8:46 pm #
Hi Cali,
I thought I’d give my point of view from ‘across the pond’ and I have to say that I don’t agree that a guy should pay all the time.
If a guy makes the first move and asks a girl out on a first date, then I think he should pay. I would offer to split it and it wouldn’t be the end of the world if he accepted that offer. But it’s certainly nicer if he refuses.
HowToAvoidDatingPeopleWhoSeeYouAsJust (Blog)
créée le 14.03.2025 à 16:27, mise à jour le 14.03.2025 à 16:27.
créée le 14.03.2025 à 16:27, mise à jour le 14.03.2025 à 16:27.