The Evolution of Dating Norms in the Digital Age
Date de l'article :
24.12.2022
Début de l'événement :
24.12.2022
Fin de l'événement :
26.12.2022
Chapo de l'article :
A Few Thoughts on Conflict in Dating
Why Trying to "Be More Feminine or Masculine" is a Trap
"Not Good Enough"
Chasing After Instant Chemistry is Foolish
Does Longevity in the Past = Mature Dater Today?
Are You Really Prepared for a Relationship?
Guys Don’t Want to Date “One of The Guys”
Things I Have Learned About Dating
Fear in Dating and Relationships
Does the Person You're Dating Make You Smile
Marrige and Happiness
Is Your Resolution to Find Love in the New Year?
Disappearing Dates
Anyway just for a bit of an alternative point of view, I’m actually loving the ‘erasure’ of sexuality you’re all complaining about. I wouldn’t really call it that, but it seems to be the same thing as you’re talking about. I thought I was a lesbian until very recently (wayyy too late in life to have such a revelation, really!), when I met my current, male, partner. This is the best relationship I’ve ever had, for reasons that absolutely do not directly involve his gender. But indirectly? The reason I’m not so stressed and worrying in this relationship is because we don’t have to keep anything secret or be nervous and hide it when we’re outside in case someone makes a comment. Being in an opposite-sex relationship is amazing. I’m sorry it has to be the case, but it really is true. I think I’m probably about 99% gay and 1% straight… ish.
Heterosexual privilege can feel wonderful indeed, when it’s something you aren’t used to. I sometimes wonder what it would feel like to be with a guy and have it again, albeit in a different way from how I felt it before — and noticed its loss when I was in a publicly same-sex relationship for a year or so after I transitioned, as compared to the publicly different-sex relationship (so far as the world was concerned) that I was in prior to my transition.
I should add that I do sort of identify as bisexual, even though I have never in my life been with a guy, either before or after my transition. I assume that it’s OK to do that.
Completely ok in my book. I don’t hold to the notion that experience is required before anyone gets to ID as a particular orientation, and I’ll push back against anyone who does. Welcome to the bi club. :)
Me neither, maedchen. Bi is, in my book, people who have been attracted to <1 genders. No sex, dating or relationships required.
I can certainly understand not wanting to be part of the queer community, especially given the bad history of the word queer. I wonder though what you meant by this:
Also, just because I have a certain sexuality doesn’t mean I’m part of some mythical community. I’m part of the normal community, thanks.
since the queer community is neither mythical not abnormal.
Yeah, that was my reaction too. I freely admit that it’s mostly spurred by bitterness.
Why Trying to "Be More Feminine or Masculine" is a Trap
"Not Good Enough"
Chasing After Instant Chemistry is Foolish
Does Longevity in the Past = Mature Dater Today?
Are You Really Prepared for a Relationship?
Guys Don’t Want to Date “One of The Guys”
Things I Have Learned About Dating
Fear in Dating and Relationships
Does the Person You're Dating Make You Smile
Marrige and Happiness
Is Your Resolution to Find Love in the New Year?
Disappearing Dates
Anyway just for a bit of an alternative point of view, I’m actually loving the ‘erasure’ of sexuality you’re all complaining about. I wouldn’t really call it that, but it seems to be the same thing as you’re talking about. I thought I was a lesbian until very recently (wayyy too late in life to have such a revelation, really!), when I met my current, male, partner. This is the best relationship I’ve ever had, for reasons that absolutely do not directly involve his gender. But indirectly? The reason I’m not so stressed and worrying in this relationship is because we don’t have to keep anything secret or be nervous and hide it when we’re outside in case someone makes a comment. Being in an opposite-sex relationship is amazing. I’m sorry it has to be the case, but it really is true. I think I’m probably about 99% gay and 1% straight… ish.
Heterosexual privilege can feel wonderful indeed, when it’s something you aren’t used to. I sometimes wonder what it would feel like to be with a guy and have it again, albeit in a different way from how I felt it before — and noticed its loss when I was in a publicly same-sex relationship for a year or so after I transitioned, as compared to the publicly different-sex relationship (so far as the world was concerned) that I was in prior to my transition.
I should add that I do sort of identify as bisexual, even though I have never in my life been with a guy, either before or after my transition. I assume that it’s OK to do that.
Completely ok in my book. I don’t hold to the notion that experience is required before anyone gets to ID as a particular orientation, and I’ll push back against anyone who does. Welcome to the bi club. :)
Me neither, maedchen. Bi is, in my book, people who have been attracted to <1 genders. No sex, dating or relationships required.
I can certainly understand not wanting to be part of the queer community, especially given the bad history of the word queer. I wonder though what you meant by this:
Also, just because I have a certain sexuality doesn’t mean I’m part of some mythical community. I’m part of the normal community, thanks.
since the queer community is neither mythical not abnormal.
Yeah, that was my reaction too. I freely admit that it’s mostly spurred by bitterness.